Mary Miller Schaefer, 80, of South Natick, formerly of Wellesley, MA, and Bethesda, MD, died of lung failure surrounded by her husband and children on September 16, 2026. Born in Louisville, KY, she was the daughter of the late Peter and Martha Miller.
Mary was raised in Princeton, NJ and Pasadena, CA, where she made lifelong friendships. She went on to earn a BA degree in Sociology from Connecticut College; a PhD in Educational Psychology from the City University of New York; and an MA in School Psychology from Tufts University. Mary’s unwavering kindness and generous spirit led her to a career working as a school psychologist at the Thoreau Elementary School in Concord, MA. She had previously worked at Harvard University (where she met her husband), MobiCentrix (New York, NY), Montgomery County School System (Gaithersburg, MD), Boston College, and Tufts University.
Above all, Mary was a devoted wife, mother, grandmother, sister and friend, and she remained deeply committed to supporting those around her. She is survived by her husband of 55 years, Dr. Ernie Schaefer; her daughter Caroline Del Col and her husband Wes of Wellesley; her son Christopher and his wife Danielle of Louisville, KY; and her son Dr. Peter Schaefer and his wife Kristen of Wenham, MA; her seven grandchildren (Avery, Austin and Addy Del Col, and Chloe, Cameron, Wyatt and Max Schaefer); her brother Peter “Mac” Miller of Hatfield, PA and her brother Reverend Sanford Miller of Sacramento, CA.
Although Mary’s respiratory health declined in recent years, she never lost her vibrant energy, her sense of humor, her passion for service and helping others, and her dedication to her family and friends. Her greatest joys in life were spending time with her children and grandchildren (whom she loved caring for, reading to, and cheering on in their games, whether on the sidelines or by watching on livestream) and traveling with her husband (to distant destinations from Egypt to French Polynesia to South Africa). She also loved playing bridge, tennis and golf with her friends, reading and discussing novels and memoirs at book club, cooking and baking, and doing philanthropy work for various organizations, particularly the Village Church in Wellesley.
The family wishes to express their gratitude to her doctors and caregivers at Tufts Medical Center. In lieu of flowers, donations in her honor can be made to the Wellesley Village Church, where a memorial service will be held for her at 2PM on Sunday, October 4th, 2026.